I have decided to make myself a promise. There is alot going on when it comes to family and life at the moment and I don’t want to lose myself or become so taught up in work and life that I forget about myself.
I am at the point in my life where I don’t know how to introduce myself. A mother? A writer? A blogger? A social media manager? A columnist? I think a mother will always come first. It comes before any job title that I may have. It always has done and it always will. It is ingrained in alot of parents that it must come first. We can work for years and years and yet the job is forgotten and it is replace with ‘I am just a parent’.
With Cleo’s diagnosis and the prospect of her going to a special needs school, it has become clear that I need to remember not to lose myself. Some people may think it is selfish to say but I am also a human too and it is a need to have a life and have my own dreams. Of course, my children will always come first. That is what naturally happens. I will stop working if my children need me. I would even cancel anything if they needed me. They will forever be my number 1.
Yet sometimes, I need to put myself first. If Cleo goes to a special needs school a few things will change. Life will be alot busier. Thankfully, I can work remotely and from home so that isn’t a problem. I don’t want to lose everything that I have worked for. I need to do something for myself and that includes have a career. I was young when I had Elsa. I was 20. Fresh out of college and everything that I have achieved so far in life is through the hard work that I have done while being a mother.
I want to promise to myself that I will always put time aside to do something for me. That means work as well as rest. I don’t just want to be known as a mother. I want to be me and what I have made myself. I am proud of how far I have come. It has been far from easy and I can only imagine that I might get a little harder if things were to change but that is something that we can sort when we get to it. This is something I need for myself.